Blessings Come in Disguise

October 24, 2014

It is 12:30 in the morning--and my mind is still active and awake. I have had this problem every day this week--and I should be tired. My stress levels are high from school, work, and a few other things I have my hands in. But--my heart is full. I have been struggling for a little bit with wondering if God is aware of me and what is going on in my heart right now and if He really has a plan for me. And this week--I had many reasons to melt down--some did come. But--being the reflective Amy I have become, I am humbled by the tender mercies He has blessed me with this week. I have felt lost and directionless at points the past few months--not sure I'm doing the right things with my life. I know I wrote on my Facebook earlier this week about lessons I have learned during the week, but here in a little more depth--is some blessings I have received.

Blessing #1

A night of multi-tasking and proof reading

I have been working on a reading endorsement for the past 2 years. I had this brilliant idea back then (that younger, ambitious Amy) that a reading endorsement would look great on my resume. So--I jumped in. I am finally on my last class! Hallelujah! But--it has been one of the hardest classes because a lot of the assignments involve working with your own class. I don't have my own class, which makes it hard. So, I've had to work extra hard to complete my assignments--borrowing friend's children, teacher's classrooms, and brainstorming creative ways to accomplish them. It has sucked a lot of analytical juices out of my brain (if I seem more analytical right now--this is why. I can't seem to bring my brain down). But--this endorsement program has brought some amazing blessings to my life. I understand reading development better. I wrote a paper a few classes ago that is getting published in The Utah English Journal. It will be coming out later. I have been reviewing the final edits this week. Publishing scholarly research was something on my list of things to do in life. Bucket list check!

Blessing #2

My National Board Coalition friends at Hill Day

Many of you know I have a passion for teacher development and helping teachers improve their practice because I feel it is a way to influence more children  by producing strong teachers who can help students, in turn influencing more children. Empowering teachers to lead and do this has been a goal of mine in life. I recently was accepted into a program with the Center for Teacher Quality, National Boards, and NEA to do a program called the Teacher Leader Initiative. This involves me doing a capstone project (more work, right?) during the next year of my life. Tonight though, the Utah National Board Coalition had a stakeholders meeting where we invited stakeholders to come and discuss how we can promote National Boards in our state. My job was to invite legislators. I invited Senator Aaron Osmond and he came and we had a great discussion with him about the value of this program and after tonight--I may have a direction for my capstone project that will help impact teachers in our state. We shall see what comes, but this was a blessing in disguise because I haven't been able to pinpoint what I wanted to do, but doors opened tonight.

Blessing #3

A progress photo...I survived a good week of workouts

dub nutrition has become a major part of my life in the past year. When I was struggling with my weight gains earlier this year--I went from a size 14 to a size 8 in about 6 months. But--I have been in a steady maintenance period. I weigh the same that I have weighed since July and my measurements haven't really changed a lot (which I am grateful for the maintenance). I was feeling frustrated though because I felt like I was failing here. I had a great opportunity to work out with a good friend of mine, Elise Gerst this week and also receive a massage from her.  During my massage, we were able to talk about my frustrations, and she reminded me of all the success I have seen. I am stronger, I can lift more and my endurance is so much more than it has ever been. My consistency in taking care of my body has helped me in so many ways. I know that without this piece and having exercise in my life--I would have had major break downs this week. Exercise has become my out. And the amazing thing Elise and I discussed about my dub journey is that not only has this happened to me, but I am becoming this--this new chapter of my healthy lifestyle journey is just starting. I have now narrowed some goals for me of what I want to do next to challenge myself with my health and fitness. And I am excited to work towards those. I have new opportunities I could never have imagined.

Friends--God does hear prayers. I was asking this week for some direction--guidance to things I needed help with in life. And right now--I feel like it has been answered for me. All those angels in my life who helped me see it this week--thank you for being in tune to help me find it and renew my hope. I am one lucky girl! I can see the light at the end of the tunnel--and I know right now is hard as I finish up my class, but I am excited about the opportunities that have been trusted to me this week.

Sometimes I need to be humbled so I can see the hand of God in my life more. So grateful He knows the right ways to do that. And grateful that I can reflect and be thankful.